Thursday, January 16, 2014

Let Her Cry

Life In Theory: 
Research sleep methods; follow carefully; have sleeping beauties for babies and toddlers.

Life In Reality:

Let Him Cry 
By Loopy and the Mom's Wish

Let him cry, baby's tears fall down like rain
As I sing, hoping it eases all his pain
Let him lay, put him in the crib to sleep
And if he falls asleep without crying
Let him be, let him be.

(If you didn't catch it, the lyrics are a  
Hootie and the Blowfish parody
of Let Her Cry.)

Every mother's wish is that her children would sleep easily, soundly and not wake up early ;) But rarely does this happen. I have at least 4 books on the topic of sleep. I have spent countless hours scouring the internet. Sometimes it works, other times they cry. And cry. And then cry some more.

I can remember sitting in front of Styder's door, with tears streaming down my face. And every time I heard the "thump, thump, thump," wiping the tears, opening the door, picking him up and putting him back in his bed. "No honey, it's time for bed. Good night, I love you." And he would scream,"Mommy!" This went on for 3 hours.

That was the worst night but we've all been there. Cringing at the whimper, the sobs for mommy or daddy. Whether it's nap time, in the car, bedtime or because they are in time out. None of us want them to cry. It would be so much easier to swoop them into our arms, wipe their tears and pull the smile back on their face.

But we all know that we have to allow them to cry sometimes. Whether it's because we can't pull the car over (or hold them while driving), they need to learn a lesson, or they have to learn to sleep- we have to let them cry. It's part of our job description in watching over and caring for our homes and families.

I will leave you with the best advice that I have ever heard from the Baby Sleep Site. You are not making them cry, you are letting them cry. That makes all the difference to me, because if I am the cause of his tears- it's a little too tough to handle.

Proverbs 31:27 
She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.

Friday, January 3, 2014

When your ready to blow your top, go on a treasure hunt!

Life in Theory: Adjuster comes out to fix car, get quote, get check, fix car, be on my way.
Life in Reality: Over a month later, still waiting...
"How do you deal with anger, when there is nothing you can do about it?" I pleaded for an answer from my mother on the phone today. After not having my car for over a month because of insurance circles (on a car accident that was not even remotely my fault); I was mad. I was tired of spending hours on the phone, leaving message after message, just to be thrown in circles. No one knew the answer, no one could help....ahhhhh!!!

I'm not dealing with lost souls here, I'm not even dealing with offended souls...but the amount of anger and frustration that was is continually building was is having a serious affect on my life, my children, my attitude, my____ fill in the blank and it's probably affecting that too!

It is simple, the innocent will be condemned in the fallen world. Not just the innocent in God, but because our world is becoming more corrupt my the moment- all innocence is being stomped on. 

What do we do about it? What I should be doing instead of writing this, basking in God's word, bathing in prayer, seeking him as if he were more precious than gold. It's actually that simple- but sometimes I think we don't want it to be. We want to have something that we can claim as fixing it, but all that soothes our soul is Him- only Him! 

We have heard over and over, seek him as a treasure, but why don't we? Imagine this- A man comes to your door and hands you a map (assuming we aren't in a fallen world, and somehow know this isn't a trap ;)). He says, "this map will bring you straight to hundreds of millions of dollars in gold. All you have to do is read it each  day, it will get you there." We wouldn't stop reading that thing. We wouldn't put it down, we would not care about the dishes, the laundry would pile up, we'd have our kids reading it out loud while we made lunch, we would be memorizing the locations just in case we lost it, our life would center around it. 

That's what it means when we say to seek Him as if we were seeking after a treasure.

So what do we do? If Christ becomes our treasure and His word becomes our map... I think the things of the world, the car, the un done dishes, the socks on the floor, the ____ won't really matter because they will no longer be our focus. They become merely things, in their rightful place-just things.  

Mathew 6: 33-34  
But seek FIRST his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things 
will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, 
for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.


Life in Theory: Get some important things done.  
Life in Reality: Get some really important things done but feel like a failure.

Because some days, all you do is wipe noses.  Nothing gets checked of the to do list, the house only gets messier. And feeling like a complete failure sets in.

Even your husband might say, "That's ok, you can get something done tomorrow." And he says it with love, with no intention of putting you down.

But what about today? If we didn't get anything done, why does it feel like we've worked so hard? Why are we ready to fall asleep as soon as the kids are put to bed? Why does it feel like we've run a triathlon?

It's a sad part of our modern culture in America that says nothings been accomplished when all you've done is take care of children all day. What we think of child raising is reflected by what we pay child care workers! When you've only changed diapers, only made 10 meals, only changed clothes, only sang songs, only nursed your babies, only played blocks on the floor, only read 20 books, only got children to nap and apologize to each other, only stopped 18 hands mid-air from slapping the nearest thing/person in the vicinity, only wiped 6 sticky faces and 12 sticky fingers, only kissed 3 booboos...

I think a new saying should be started. "Make it an Only Day!" When I have a day, when I only take care of my children, then I've done something right! I've set my priorities in order! If nothing else happened in an entire week, it would be a victory.

Because really... what is more important? 

Unfortunately we can't do that, we have to do those other not so important things. Bills have to be paid, dishes have to be washed, and for some reason we think facebook has to be checked.

But the next time the world is tricking you into believing, you've only taken care of your children and you're feeling guilty....change your mindset to, "Oh thank God, I only took care of my children. I got the most important job done today!"And once you've done that, then you can see if you have time to waste on the other junk ;) Because when you've only raised children, you have got more than enough done for the day!

Proverbs 22:6 
Train up a child in the way he should go; 
even when he is old he will not depart from it.